Run, Bambi, run!

I have managed to avoid working for the past 5 or 6 months, and in that time have developed an impressive repertoire of daytime TV intelligence NOT INCLUDING soap operas, court shows or Lifetime movies.

My favorite time of day is noon to one when A&E (usually) broadcasts "American Justice" (today's episode is about Lawrencia "Bambi" Bembenek).

On good days "City Confidential" comes on 11 to noon, and "Cold Case Files" comes on one to two. (It's a wonder I find time to go to the gym). I believe that I now know more about outdated cases than anyone in the NY Metro area. I'm comfortably certain that I know more than the people who pull the files at A&E. It's like a game of "Name that Tune"...give me a five second clip of any episode and I can tell you who it is about, who did it and whether or not they are currently serving prison time. But have they made a Trivial Pursuit version of Forensic TV? Noooo. It's just another way The Man is trying to keep me from droppin' knowledge on the people...or at least my fellow players at my dining room table. Typical.

Damn Republicans. Always trying to keep a girl down.

I have come up with my next job, though. I have discovered that I am imminently qualified to be a TV programming executive. I have an eerie (often very annoying) ability to order DVDs from Netflix that show up on television within a week (thus peeving me off to have wasted a rental opportunity). I figure that means I have my pulse on the American viewing public (or on the Hollywood showing monopoly). Either way, I obviously know what is going on and should therefore be paid millions of dollars to peruse Netflix's 900 million listings and choose what to show. That would be even sweeter than being Director of Public Relations for Video Professor!