I have discovered a new source of bottom-of-the-barrel entertainment.

IMDb (Internet Movie Database for those of you not "in the know") has a One Hundred Worst Movies Ever list. Who knew? Here I've been wasting my life with the traditional trial-and-error approach to finding bad movies when all I had to do was go to my trusty Internet sources and let my opinions be molded by the opinions of thousands of people I never have (or will) meet!

Since the weekend is coming up, I thought I'd share with you some of the movies you should NOT beating down Blockbuster's doors to be renting.

Number 1 on the list is 2006's "Phat Girlz" (which, I believe, opened and closed the same day...if not, it probably should have.)

Starring Mo'Nique of "The Parkers" fame, the movie tells the story of "an aspiring plus size fashion designer struggling to find love and acceptance."

Uh huh. Maybe it'll get her enough love and acceptance to land her on "The Surreal Life 7."

Second up is 1989's "Going Overboard" featuring Adam Sandler (in his first starring role) as Schecky Moskowitz (doing a good job of proving that he had a long way to go before making it to box office gold.) Seems that Schecky is a struggling young comedian who takes a menial job on a cruise ship where he hopes for his big chance to make it in the world of cruise ship comedy.

Okay...make it "big" in the world of "cruise ship comedy"? No wonder this movie bombed. Maybe he should have tried to make it "phat" in the world of cruise ship comedy.

Fifth on the list is a movie entitled "Santa with Muscles" made in the easily forgotten year of 1996 (aside from me getting sworn into the great State of New York's judicial system as an attorney, nothing interesting happened for me in 1996...oh no, wait a minute - that was the year I started work at Unnamed Government Agency. But other than those two things, it was a dull year.) It stars Hulk Hogan as an evil millionaire who suffers the overused plot device of getting amnesia and wakes up thinking he's Santa Claus.

Hulk would be guaranteed a spot on "Surreal Life 7" if he didn't already have a VH1 show called "Hogan Knows Best." (more on this later.)

Just easing out of the Top 10 at #11 (mainly due, I suspect, to the addition of "Phat Girlz")...Mariah Carey's 2001 entry, "Glitter".


The only thing better than reading about a celebrity's nervous breakdown in the tabloids while you're waiting in the checkout line is seeing it portrayed (far too convincingly) on screen.

The only one of the 100 movies I've actually seen (hooray for me for instinctively staying away from the worst of the worst!) is 1994's "It's Pat." And I gotta tell ya, I was sorry to see it (hahaha) on the list. This isn't a flick I will be adding to my DVD collection by any stretch of the imagination, but I thought it was absolutely hilarious while I was watching it.

Of course, I thought "Howard the Duck" (1986) was hilarious as well and I seem to be in the minority on that one, too...although, interestingly, HTD doesn't appear on the list. Oh well. Can't win them all.